The (un)Social Network

8 years ago when an otherwise ordinary looking guy from Harvard College created facebook, he had not imagined he is going to change the world’s social order as it existed then. Within a time span that seems seconds for a business to be profitable, this unique phenomenon did one more thing- to make Mark Zuckerburg the youngest billionaire on the planet.

It all started as what looked like a fad for the people subscribing to it, and ended up being a F.A.D. (explained later here) for many of them. Yes, most of the people started using it thinking it was something very unique, interesting and “cool to be on”, totally oblivious to the consequences it was bound to have on their day-to-day lives. To begin with, let me clarify one thing – I am neither a cynic nor was I born in the Stone Age. To be honest, I am myself an addict to this networking site. So to say, I am rather a victim and not a problem-solver here. Which is why it worries me everyday how the technology brought to life to make our lives easier is doing exactly the opposite.

Before I delve any further, most of you may negate what I say and stop reading further, thinking – every technology has its negatives, what does this man has against facebook?! The answer is NOTHING. It’s how, and how much, of it we are using is where the problem starts. A website which aimed to make connecting with each other easier is actually making us social-secludes. This point is proven when many of us ask ourselves – when was the last time I called an old friend I was out of touch with? ("I can’t recall; it’s easier to post “Hey, how have you been?” on his or her wall!") Or when was the last time you wished a friend his or her birthday by sending flowers or a greeting card? ("Are you kidding me!? That’s a thing of the 90’s!") How the social networking has taken out personal touch out of how we socialise is like a post…errr writing on the wall.

Another major issue with even more serious consequences is how social networking has actually become a rostrum for self-propagation. “Just got my new car – A cool Mercedes C! Thanks Dad!”, “Off for a vacation to Hawaii for a week!” – All sound too familiar, don’t they? This is like adding fuel to fire in our already speeding, never-ending mad race of outdoing our friends, colleagues and relatives. It’s not evil to be competitive, but when it all takes a more complex form of envy, dissatisfaction with one’s own life and later, depression is what has serious repercussions.

And then there are other mental anomalies psychologists keep talking about – one of them mostly ignored as a cultural commonality is F.A.D. or facebook addiction disorder, a mental disorder where the victim cannot endure even a single day or two of withdrawal from checking his or her facebook account. Doing so only leads to anxiety and restlessness. A research in US in 2010 suggested that as many as 350 million people worldwide are suffering from this disorder. And the number, needless to say, is rising.

Alright, what do we do then? Most of you will read my blog for the last time if I suggest deactivating your account. Of course I am not doing that. But what we can do here is to bring some amount of discipline on how we use it and how much we use it. We can start regulating our timing and time span that we dedicate to checking our facebook account, which will obviously be a gradual exercise. The other way is to inculcate a self-discipline as to what we post and write. After all, it’s a social networking, and not “blatant bragging”, site.

Lastly, next time you feel like knowing how is that high school friend doing, do not snoop into his or her profile. Instead, find out his or her number and just make a phone call. I am sure he or she will tell you how great feeling that is, without hitting the “like” button!